January 2011
I’m going to quit smoking this year. I’m spending my first moments of 2011 in a bar and a few parties. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
December 2010
Sitting in my car for hours on end is starting to get really, really old.
I’m blowing my nose all over everything in this house.
Reblog if you think boobs are awesome.
That moment when you're reading a book and you...
Oh daaaaamn....
Wait, that’s a dude!? What the god damn fuck!?!!!? /gay
I'm not cute, nor have I ever been.
Ima be posting all night, I can tell.
I judge people that smoke weed.
I had a really awkward conversation about condom sizes and how they all suck in the middle of Barnes and Noble today.
<
p>No one can take me seriously when I say I’m embarrassed that normal sized ones feel like they’re putting a vice grip on my junk and I don’t have the self esteem to buy some that are big enough.
<
p>But I’m a huge pervert and I totally...
If James Wilson wants to post Aes Rock lyrics he...
“No more pencils
No more books
I built the city out of one brick
It had a...”
– Aesop Rock, The Crook and the Mayor
The amount of coughing I do at night causes my...
Fuck on being sick.
That awkward moment you sext the wrong person AND...
xprophetx:
southerncomfortsmiles:
lol wats sexting.
My family is going to want to get real personal and helpful and close tonight/tomorrow. I’m to have the same reaction I get when a girl gets to into me (not that that happens much). Basically, I’m going to feel crowded, clustered, watched, and I’m going to freak out. It’ll be like that scene in Greednsboro when Ben Stiller freaks out and screams “SIT ON MY DICK, YOU...
Hey everyone! It's Friday! What's everyone up to...
What? Who’s having a baby? Oh.
Slut.
She says "You're not boring, I'm just bored with...
The psychology behind it is ruthless, I wish it weren’t true. I wish we weren’t so complicated, wish you weren’t so medicated.
She just expressed an interest in Pokémon. It reminded me that we are, in fact, soulmates.
Things I can tell you from being sick.
I can tell you from experience that snorting coke is way easier than snorting Afrin. I can tell you that Emergen-C tastes like piss and Tang together. I can tell you that Halls makes the best cough drops ever, except they’re so good I just eat them. So they don’t do you any good. I can tell you that the timing of sickness is impeccable, considering I’ve been trapped in a bedroom...
I think the drunk girl who attacked me at the...
Totally not worth it. I’m all congested and gross feeling.
I just wanna play Scrabble with you.
I hate my dad for how inconsiderate he is. End of story.
I got kissed by a totally plastered girl who was more than willing to fuck last night.
I’m very happy that I find that to be a huge turnoff.
fuckyeahbonersatwork.
Jersey's Best Dancers
Yeah, so…
The drive home from work is long enough for me to listen to that whole album once.
I’ve been playing Pokémon Red on my computer for two days.
Fuck society, I’m Wartortle is about to grow some guns.
TOO DEREK PAYNE
Keep the naked boys coming. On my Tumblr feed and in your bedroom.
I am posting this so I don’t have to look at a picture of a naked soldier at the top of my feed.
No, I’m not a homophobe, I embrace all my gay niggas as a matter of fact.
The thing is, I just got done with my date with Handberlin and, you know, it’s late. That’s all. Totally drained and it’s late. I love how Tumblr really brings out your sexuality.
Love you...
I don’t think I’ve posted any Grade A blogging material yet. I really need to learn how to be a neat little photographer or an aspiring inspiring artist or something.
Or maybe stop whining about my life so I could start writing again like I used to instead of all these knock-off MCR lyrics that have been pouring out of me lately.
Reblog if you love touching boobs.
I usually don't write about getting fucked up.
Where am I? What am I doing here? It seems like an hour ago I was fine. Laughing, learning, loving and living. In a split second I find myself here, lying face up with a face down view of this thing that looks like my face. I just want to sit up, I’m trying my best but there’s smoke in my eyes and there’s glass in my chest.
Little glass pieces, tiny broken shards of my...
Hi. Let's have a dick measuring contest on the...
I’ll start by saying I like something. You say something to agree with me. I ask if you know such-and-such minor detail about whatever it is I like. You assume I just insulted your intelligence, get offended, make a three paragraph explanation of what an idiot I am, then top it off by calling me a hipster because I work at Urban Outfitters.
To which I reply:
“tl;dr
fgt”
I don't think I'm capable of handling any strong...
